Siblings fighting – how to handle it?
Anon is asking:
I have two boys, a 6 years old and a 3 years old and they are constantly fighting about everything. Who’s going to choose first a seat on the table, who’s going to play with a particular car, who’s going to decide what cartoon to watch on TV etc. Sometimes it also involves physical fighting (pulling hair, biting etc). My oldest one refuses to share with his brother and the youngest wants what the oldest one has or does. I find it hard to refrain myself from yelling and imposing ‘punishments’ and I am running out of ideas. How do or would you handle it? My husband says it’s normal, kids fight all the time, but it makes me sad and I am not coping.
Thank you for listening and sharing your thoughts.
Category: Your Questions
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From what I understand boys together are a nightmare because they are always fighting to be the top man even if unconsciously. When mine (boy and girl similar ages) do that I ask them to take turns i.e. say now is the oldest turn next time they come to sit down its the younger to sit on that aprticular. If it is TV they have to agree on a cartoons they both like or TV remains shut. IF its toys and I know for sure that one of them was playing with it than the other has to return it and ask nicely if he can use it. If I do not know but the toy is of that particular child I remind the other that he has t ask nicely for the toy not just take it etc. It is not easy and it iwill take a while before you all start falling into it etc but you can do it. I suggest you read peaceful parents happy kids by Dr Markham very insightful
I found this artcile very useful on how to prevent kids from fighting: http://www.ahaparenting.com/ask-the-doctor-1/how-to-stop-siblings-fighting