Guest blog post by Neve Spicer* 

Break out the balloons and hang the streamers, it’s Breastfeeding Awareness Month! It’s the season to celebrate mothers, babies, and the beautiful bond that nursing creates between them. Best part? No shopping, no wrapping, no returning, no exchanging; it’s all about you and your child.

Unfortunately, you do still have to get up early. Afterall, that beautiful baby ain’t gonna feed herself.

But here’s the thing:

In reality breastfeeding doesn’t always feel like a party. There are clogged ducts, sleepless nights, and teeth. Oh god, the teeth…

Despite the (sometimes painful) let-downs of breastfeeding, the human race as a whole agrees that it is the healthiest way for babies to get their nourishment. Your breast milk represents a virtually perfect, easily digestible mixture of antibodies and nutrition. Well duh, you might be thinking, we’ve all known that for a while.

Would it then surprise you to learn that in the US 68% of financially well-off mothers will breastfeed their baby for six months, and yet only 38% of mothers living beneath the poverty line will do the same? (source)

This huge disparity is echoed in the UK and most European countries, too. The repeating pattern is that less well-off mothers have significantly lower breastfeeding rates.

WeTheParents has created a startling visualisation that delves into the socioeconomic factors that drastically shape inequalities among mothers and breastfeeding rates.

Highlighting these disparities isn’t about shaming mothers – precisely the opposite. It’s about looking hard at the socioeconomic factors causing the problems. It’s about dropping the notion that all moms have the same breastfeeding opportunities and choices. They don’t.

As a blogger, I unfortunately got caught up in the mommy wars, and chose to rant about why breast was best. Yes, this is a valuable message, but the real issue isn’t whether well-off, well-informed mothers choose to breastfeed; it’s that less well-off women aren’t getting access to invaluable breastfeeding support.

Here are just a few reasons that less well-off mothers find it more difficult to reach optimal breastfeeding goals:

• Less access to paid maternity leave
• Lower paid jobs that are less likely to allow for pumping breaks
• Inadequate maternity and lactation support in hospital
• Less effective family and community support
• More susceptible to formula marketing
• A culture that may not unconsciously treat breastfeeding as a desirable status symbol

Tackling these issues will be no mean feat. But mothers, let’s come together around a goal that we can all agree on: that all mums from all walks of life should have equal knowledge, opportunity, and support to breastfeed (if they want to).

When I discovered the data highlighting breastfeeding inequality I had to ditch my lactivist tribalism. I still consider myself a breastfeeding activist, but my aim now is to help re-frame the debate and make it less divisive. It’s time to stop the mommy wars. Instead, let’s unite and focus our collective energy upon the socioeconomic forces that are powerfully affecting breastfeeding outcomes.

Change always begins with awareness and conversation. Mamas, let’s do this!

———-

*Neve Spicer is a reformed (and now more empathetic) breastfeeding advocate and proud mother of two. After seven years of full-time teaching, Neve decided to take her passion for kids, education, and parenting online by founding We The Parents, a parenting resource and blog that searches for simplicity and humour in family life.

The post Mothers, Let’s Unite to end Breastfeeding Inequality first appeared on Maltamum.

Antonella Grech Gili is a primary school teacher at St Albert the Great College. At the moment she’s on parental leave to take care of their nearly 2 year old toddler. So in between nappies, meals, reading books and play time, she has a tea and scribbles down some thoughts as a poem. Below you can find a poem she wrote for her son, which I instantly loved once I read it and wanted to share it with you all <3

A poem for my son

I became a new mother
Without ever knowing before
How much of my old life
I had to change and ignore.

I stayed all day home
To care for our son,
To cook and to clean
And fill his day with fun.

I gave up what i love,
It just had to be done.
The parties and friends,
The travelling in the sun.

It was surely not easy
To change all I am…
But all was just worth it
For this special boy, Tommy Sam.

For though i gave up,
I also acquired.
And now i can say,
I have all i ever desired.

A small hand to hold,
While walking together.
A smile that could make
Your day a lot better.

A hug and a giggle,
10 toes just to kiss,
Reading time all cuddly
Which i never want to miss.

So although life has changed
And my old life is done,
I do not regret it one minute
Cause it’s all for you, my son.

The post A poem for my son first appeared on Maltamum.

Being a mum can be a hard job at times. For all your effort, you’ll be rewarded with sleepless nights, an empty wallet and stretch marks. But all the challenges you face as a mum will be completely worth it, as long as your baby is happy and healthy. Choosing breastfeeding, when it is an option to choose in between breastfeeding and formula feeding, will get you closer to that ultimate goal.

To help mums make an informed decision about which method of feeding they’ll choose, MomLovesBest has created a list; The 111 Benefits of Breastfeeding – For Babies, Moms & Everyone Else

And here, the  team behind Babycared have put together a solid resource about the benefits
of breastfeeding that’s geared towards helping new mums overcome their breastfeeding struggles. There is a ton of information out there,
and this guide was designed to cut through the noise a bit. 

Should you stumble upon any other useful articles please let us know by leaving a comment below.

Thank you, Liza.

The post 111 Reasons To Pick Breast Over Formula first appeared on Maltamum.

Guest post by Anya Sol*

When I was about 7 months pregnant my mother absolutely insisted I buy a full travel system with the push chair, carrycot and a car seat. I thought differently. I talked to her about buying a sling and wear my baby instead. “You will do what?” – asked she, “You will WEAR the baby?! Don’t be foolish, this is inconvenient and unpractical, I don’t want to hear any of this nonsense. You are buying a normal pram“.

I immediately remembered a typical image from the Soviet times of young mothers with those huge ugly square heavy prams blocking the streets and before I knew it, I was not far off from that image. I followed my mum’s advice and I purchased a whole travel system. With a push chair, carrycot, that even rocked, so that the baby could sleep in it, and a car seat. It weighed around 14 kilos, and that was one of the lightest options! So imagine carrying that plus 5 kilos of a baby even for the shortest of distances through a staircase and then rolling it out in the streets of Malta. Convenient, my mum said?

No wonder we ended up using a baby carrier instead of the pram on most of occasions when going out. Not to mention that my baby was exclusively breastfed, slept next to me at night and generally liked to be close to my chest pretty much 24/7. She is almost three now and she still likes to be carried in the arms. It is no secret that infants like to be carried and stay close to their mothers.

From the baby gear I purchased I hardly ever used the carrycot, I never used the pushchair because I changed it for a lightweight one, and I only used the car seat for about 8 months or so because my child grew out of it rather fast. The baby carrier was the most used item with the highest value for its money.

So if I had to do it all over again, I would definitely not waste my money and strength on the travel system, but buy ONLY the following baby gear: an Ergobaby carrier, a lightweight pushchair from 3-4 months to be used for travelling and longer outings, and a robust car seat to be used from 0 to 5 years.

*Anya Sol is a 31 year old mum of a young girl and works as an Online Marketing Manager.

The post You will do what? WEAR your baby? Nonsense! first appeared on Maltamum.

 Guest writer Carolyn Sultana*

A silent reality for some women

Everyone has his own special memory of childbirth with most women describing the birth of a child as the most wonderful, rewarding moment in life.  As amazing as that experience might be, some women do end up with physical trauma which causes them pain and distress.  Such trauma needs careful assessment and management.

85% of women will sustain vaginal / perineal trauma (tear) after childbirth and at least 70% will require suturing.  A small percentage of women will experience short-term complications such as difficulty in healing and infection of the wound.  Other women might have longer-term consequences such as urinary and fecal incontinence, pelvic organ prolapse, sexual pain, psychosocial problems and postnatal depression.  It is essential for health care providers to assess and repair the perineal trauma in an accurate manner and provide women with all the relevant and necessary information.

What is perineal trauma?

Trauma to the perineum caused by childbirth is classified according to the extent of the tear.  First-degree tear is limited to skin only.  Second-degree tear involves the perineal muscles (spontaneous tear or episiotomy).  Third degree tear involves the tearing of either the external or internal anal sphincter with fourth degree tear involving the anal sphincter complex and anal epithelium.

What are the risk factors?

Normally women, who have their first vaginal delivery, give birth to babies more than 4kg in weight and with prolonged second stage of labour are at an increased risk.  Women who had previous perineal repair are also at a risk.

How can I ease the discomfort of the stitches?

• Keep the area clean and dry as much as possible, change sanitary protection regularly (at least every 4 hours) and do not use tampons
• Take a daily bath or shower and wash with gentle soap and rinse with clear lukewarm water.  Pat dry the perineal area with a soft clean towel
• Be aware of signs of infection such as increased pain, excessive discharge that has changed colour, suture breakdown and swelling
• Take the pain killers as prescribed by the doctor
• Eat a well balanced diet with plenty of water intake to ensure your urine is dilute and avoid stinging the wound
• Pain and swelling can be decreased with the use of ice.  You can use the shower head to spray your perineum with cool water or else wrap an ice cube in cling film and massage the area for a few minutes, several times a day.  Do not sit on an icepack as this slows the circulation and the healing.
• Avoid sitting or standing for long periods and you can also try breastfeeding your baby on your side.
• Do not wear tight jeans or pants
• When at the privacy of your house you may wish to lie in bed without a sanitary towel and letting your perineum ‘air dry’
• Start pelvic floor exercises within the first 24 hours and only after any catheter has been removed and urine passed

Can perineal trauma lead to bladder problems?

Stretching of the muscles during birth can lead to weakening of the pelvic floor muscles.  Immediately after birth the area may feel numb and you might have difficulty controlling your urine.  There are situations when new mums leak when they stand, cough or laugh or before they manage to reach a toilet.  Most of the time, these symptoms will settle in the first few weeks after birth, however should they persist beyond six weeks you should seek the help of a specialized physiotherapist.

Will it be difficult to open the bowel after perineal trauma?

The idea of needing to open your bowels might seem daunting however there are ways to help yourself.  It is normal to worry about your stitches.  You can opt to hold a clean pad against your perineum to protect your stitches when you pass faeces the first few times.  The doctor might also be able to prescribe medications to soften your stools to make it easier.  Help yourself by drinking plenty of water, and eating a diet high in fibre, fruit and vegetables.  When you finish from the toilet, pat the area dry from front to back or you can opt to use a shower or bidet.

What about sex?

Perineal trauma is unfortunately related to painful intercourse.  Resuming sexual experience is different for every woman and varies between countries and cultures.  Normally women tend to wait for their postnatal visit at the obstetricians before their first postnatal sexual experiences.  Should the first experience be painful, couples should not be disheartened.  It is understandable that changes in sexual function and desire are normal after childbirth however if pain persists this should be discussed with a care provider and a referral to a women’s health physiotherapist should be done.  A women’s health physiotherapist is able to examine the pelvic floor, treat painful areas with massage and teach self-massage techniques and start a structured pelvic floor training programme.

If any of your problems related to trauma to the perineum persist you should talk to your obstetrician for further management and referral to a women’s health physiotherapist.

*Carolyn Sultana is a mum and a Women’s Health Physiotherapist BSc (Hons) SRP, MSc . Contact details:  M: 79962109, Clinic: T: 21493555 , St Anne’s Clinic, Triq Karmenu Pirotta, Birkirkara, E: carolynsultana@gmail.com, Facebook: WomensHealthPhysiotherapyMalta

The post 10 things to do if you experienced a tear with childbirth first appeared on Maltamum.

As mums we all want the best for our babies. And most of us do start with the intention to breastfeed, as we know that this is the best choice. The thing is, many of us come from a generation that didn’t breastfeed. Our mums can guide us through many things but quite often not through the struggles of breastfeeding. Our immediate network might not know much either. As things can be rough in the beginning, it is so easy to turn to formula either because we feel we cannot cope or from fear that our baby isn’t nursing enough.

Before making assumptions and taking any decisions, please do be aware that here in Malta we have lots of support offered to us either for free or with minimal charges. Did you know for instance that for every breastfed baby the formula industry loses on average 1,000 Euro per year?! A private breastfeeding counsellor might be charging 10-15 Euro for a home visit. And at the Breastfeeding Clinic you can go and call as many times as you want for free.

Trust me, they can do wonders! My boy is 26 months now and we are still breastfeeding, although I feel we’re reaching the end of our journey. I wouldn’t have been able to do it without the support received at the Breastfeeding Clinic at Mater Dei, the online community of Breastfeeding Matters on Facebook and talking with friends who go through the same struggles and love complaining about the same things – lack of sleep

Just yesterday I read an inspirational, breastfeeding success story of a Maltese mum who managed to breastfeed her baby despite the problems. And many mums replied that they also succeeded thanks to the support they received. It was uploaded on Breastfeeding Matters and I got Sandra Saliba‘s permission, the mum, to share it with you all.

‘I would like to take you through my breastfeeding story.

My son, Oliver, is now 2 months old. From the beginning, I was determined to breastfeed him as I was convinced that breastfeeding is the best nutritional method.

Mine and Oli’s beginning was not easy due to the fact that he did not have the natural sucking instinct. We had to start slowly and be patient… very patient. At first we had to feed him through a syringe with the expressed breast milk or formula. It was a hard work. For a first time parents dealing with all this experience was rather a nightmare. In addition, seeing him upset after formula did not help. Everybody was telling me to give up, people were trying to convince me that it will be better for both my baby and myself to stop breastfeeding. Despite it all I wanted so badly to breastfeed my little boy. The only people supporting me, besides my husband, were the ladies from the breastfeeding clinic at Mater Dei.
Anyway, the time of the hospital discharge has come, and Oli was still not feeding from the breast and we were sent home with a newborn and a syringe. It was all scary. I was worried that my baby boy is not getting enough food. I bet every mother knows the pain and distress she has to go through in such a situation.

This is when I started to properly attend the breastfeeding clinic, where I got to know Helen and the rest of this great team. It was like a new hope. I felt that I am surrounded by people that are willing to give me a helping hand, guide me through the breastfeeding and encourage me in everything I could do. They did not judge, they were always there, ready to help me. I was seeing them every day and they were welcoming, patient, supportive and full of understanding. We tried all the breastfeeding positions and techniques, we discussed how to increase milk production and we have never ever mentioned giving up. They helped me in the time of mastitis, something that I had no clue what is about and something that definitely could have discouraged me. Each time I had a problem or needed to talk to someone, I knew where I should turn to. Helen knows all the technique, tools and equipment should use or anything else related to the breast, breastfeeding and baby care.
I am so impressed with the staff’s attitude, dedication, motivation and work ethic. I would recommend support of this team to any mum in need. If you are reading this piece, please do not give up on breastfeeding and if you need help you should go to this clinic. Your little one will be healthy and happy, and you will be satisfied and fulfilled that you did a good job.

I would like to take this opportunity to thank the breastfeeding clinic for everything that they have done for me and Oli. All the young staff – particularly Rebecca, Leanne and Marla – is so friendly and kind-hearted. I would especially like to thank Helen for her dedication, passion and charisma. You are a Godsend. The fact that you keep researching, learning and improving is truly inspirational. Thank you!

Sandra’

Are you also struggling? A list of helpful links below

Click here to find out where to turn to when you need help with breastfeeding.
Click here to distinguish the different types of support available, so you can tap on the right one at the right time.
Click here for a nutritional guide for breastfeeding mother.

The post Breastfeeding Success Story – Breastfeeding Clinic Mater Dei first appeared on Maltamum.

Ergo 360 visits the Malta Aquarium – by Becky Gauci Maistre from Baby Wearing Malta

I have been positively burning with curiosity about the Ergo 360 and whether it would like up to all the hype created, so when Elisavet Arkolaki, of Maltamum, sent over a sample donation for the library, I was truly excited to try it out.

What is it?

The Ergo 360 is an ergonomic carrier from one of the leading manufacturers of such carriers. Unlike the majority of ergonomic carriers, the Ergo 360 also offers a front-forward facing position, making it a 4-position carrier. The majority of ergonomic carriers, including the Ergo Original and the Ergo Performance, only a measly 3 positions in comparison.

What does it look like? (click on the picture to zoom in)

The Ergo 360 looks like any standard ergonomic carrier, but had some fancy button work going on in places rival carriers don’t. The base is also slightly narrower than your average ergonomic carrier, which is reflected in the fact that the carrier is restricted to a weight limit of 15kg.

Structurally, it feels very solid. The waist band is longer than average and secures with Velcro and a standard buckle clip over it for added safety. This makes it more adjustable to different body shapes and sizes. The back panel is much thicker than average ergonomic carriers, though.

There are buttons on the outside of the back panel that allow the panel width to be narrowed when in front-forward mode, and more buttons on the shoulder straps for the hood. This is quite different to the popper-style buttons found on the majority of carriers.

The design is intriguing and is clearly a fashion item as much as it is a functional one.

How does it work?

When in front-inward, hip or back-carry, it works just like any other standard ergonomic carrier and is only different in its weight limits. When wearing, the reason for this lowered weight limit is obvious in the slightly narrower seat width.

When wearing baby in the 3 standard positions: front-inward, back or hip, the seat is adjusted to the blue buttons, which results in the seat width being spread to the maximum width. When wearing in a front-outward position, the seat is adjusted to the grey buttons, which slightly narrows the seat width, whilst still keeping baby’s legs in a spread-squat position. This last point is where Ergo 360 differs significantly from all other front-forward facing carriers. A typical narrow-based carrier will have baby’s legs hanging straight down regardless of carry position. In this manner, Ergo are keeping pressure off the baby’s spine and hips. Ergo only recommend the forward-facing/front-outward position from 5 months and up to 12 months, 5 months being the average age a baby will no longer require a version of the insert.

Just like all other ergonomic carriers, when in one of the 3 standard positions, the waist band is worn on the pelvic bones. However, when in front-forward, the waist band should be raised slightly higher.

Due to being able to wear it slightly higher than average (most carrier waist band is on the hips), the Ergo 360 is a very suitable carrier for use after a caesarean section.

Trial Run Results

My son was 9 months at the time of testing, and I feel very in tune with him. Feeling confident in my abilities to read him, I decided to forgo “start with 5 -10 minutes” limit guideline provided, and really put several factors to the test. Now I need to add a disclaimer here that I suffer from Diastasis Recti (abdominal muscle separation), back and pelvic pain, and whiplash. I will not deny I was extremely wary of front-forward carry. Please be aware that Ergo specifically state “We view the front-outward position (‘facing out’) as a supplementary option for short, active periods and not as the primary carrying method over multiple hours.” (It is recommended that the instructions, as well as the FAQs, are read thoroughly before using the Ergo 360.)

Getting the 360 set up for front forward was really easy and straight forward. Wearing the waist band was easy enough, although it took a few tries to get it just right. Having the strap and buckle over it felt reassuring. Getting baby in was quite funny. He is clearly not used to the front-forward position and immediately tried to turn himself into his usual worn position. Once he figured out this was different, he was quite amused. I followed instructions at first, and kept his arms under the straps and out of the side. He really hated this and within 5 minutes had figured out how to pull them out and over the front. Now I think this may have been more comfortable for him, but it clearly shifted his weight, and therefore my centre of gravity, and I felt the strain a little more. He was much happier this way. By this point, we had renewed our membership and were heading into the Aquarium.

Although it is generally much cooler inside the exhibit, the 360 is much thicker than the average ergonomic carrier, and I soon had to remove his t-shirt. To be fair, this was the height of August too.

My son got very excited to see the fish and being able to reach out and touch the tanks. He jumped with delight several times, which put a strain on my back. When we got half way through (some 25 minutes at this point), I was starting to feel some pressure in my lower back. Not significant, mind, so I decided to carry on. Barely few minutes after I noted my discomfort, my son started exhibiting signs of hyper-stimulation. At this point we were at my favourite exhibit: an enormous window into the shark tank. It is super area because there are crates to sit on. I really feel that should the Aquarium open up that area as a mini café, I would be down there working from there every day. So peaceful…but I digress.

We sat on a crate and I cuddled my little one still in his forward facing position. But I could lean forward and allow him to see my face. Now sitting down with baby on you in the 360 is smashing. I absolutely loved it. I can imagine going out for coffee or light lunch, with baby in front-forward in the 360. Big huge big over everything and let him get stuck in. Heck, I’m looking forward to trying that. How many times do you go out with a buggy or ask for a highchair and baby ends up in your lap anyway? With the 360 there would be no straining to hold them into place and they are in a comfortable sitting position, as are you. I absolutely loved it. No more, no less.

We spent our usual 10 minutes at this exhibit and then moved on. Baby started straining to turn around and this was a great opportunity to test the hype on how easy this was. So back clip off, straps off, while supporting baby of course. Turn baby front –inward, straps on, back clip on. Button left. Button right. A little bit of tugging here and there to make sure seat is maximised well, and a little bit of adjusting baby’s bum…and done. Easy peasy. If I were to go from front-inward to front-outward, I would close up the seat first, then turn baby.

Verdict

Pros: Highly adjustable, easy to use, comfortable, ergonomic front-forward with some restrictions but overall lived up to the hype.

Cons: Much thicker than your average ergonomic carrier, and slightly narrower seat width reduces its upper weight limit.

My baby now appears ready to start short stints in back carry. As he is still young (10 months), I will be using the hip scoot method. I look forward to seeing how this will work with the Velcro waist band. Stay tuned!

The Ergo 360, along with the full Ergobaby range, is available from Maltamum via www.maltamumshop.com

*Becky Gauci Maistre is a Baby Wearing Educator and owner of the Baby Wearing Malta Facebook group that currently counts over 1,000 members. Becky is a founding partner of Parenting from the Womb. She is also the founder of Tree of Life which provides childbirth education, post-partum doula services, support for birth trauma mothers, healing from a traumatic birth experience, preparing for birth after a traumatic birth experience, support for VBAC (vaginal birth after caesarean) and CBAC (caesarean birth after caesarean), hosts the local chapter of Momma Trauma’s Sacred Circles and is a co-founder of the Better Birth Coalition – a member of the Positive Birth Movement.

The post Ergo 360 review by the Baby Wearing Educator Becky Gauci Maistre first appeared on Maltamum.

Guest writer Carolyn Sultana*

The pelvic floor is a group of muscles that spans from the pubic bone at the front and the tail bone at the back and from the base of the pelvis. This sling of muscle and ligaments function to support the bladder, bowel and uterus.  Every woman needs to be aware of these muscles and of how to contract them especially during the antenatal and postnatal period.  

What are the symptoms of a weak pelvic floor?

• Incontinence

There are different types of incontinence with the most common being stress incontinence with leakages on activities such as cough, sneeze, laugh, lift, sex or exercise.  People might also experience urgency and urge incontinence with inability to reach the toilet on time and very frequent visits to the toilet.

• Prolapse

Since the role of the pelvic floor is support of pelvic organs, its weakness can lead to prolapse of the bladder, uterus and bowel.

What causes the pelvic floor to become weak?

• Childbirth
• Being overweight
• Constipation and excessive straining to empty the bowels
• Persistent heavy lifting
• Repetitive excessive coughing
• Menopause with its hormonal changes

How can the muscles be strengthened?

Pelvic floor exercises need to be practiced daily and incorporated into the persons’ routine.  When you exercise you need to train both slow and fast contractions.  Adopt a comfortable position in sitting, lying or standing and concentrate on your contractions.  During the exercises aim to keep your buttocks and thigh muscles relaxed and breathe normally.

SLOW CONTRACTIONS: Imagine you are trying to stop yourself from passing gas and at the same time you want to think about stopping the flow of urine.  You should feel a squeeze and a lift sensation.  Try to hold this contraction as long as you can for a maximum of 10 seconds and slowly release.  Rest for 10 seconds in between each contraction.  Aim to build repetitions slowly and to a maximum of 10 repetitions.

FAST CONTRACTIONS: Squeeze and lift your pelvic floor muscles as strongly and quickly as your can and only keep the contraction for 1 seconds.  Release and repeat for a maximum of 10 contractions.

If you are unsure of how to do your exercises, or you do not feel any squeeze and lift when you try to contract, it is important to seek help from a specialized women’s health physiotherapist.  A session at the physiotherapist will involve an internal examination to assess the strength and teach a proper pelvic floor contraction.

*Carolyn Sultana is a mum and a Women’s Health Physiotherapist BSc (Hons) SRP, MSc . Contact details:  M: 79962109, Clinic: T: 21493555 , St Anne’s Clinic, Triq Karmenu Pirotta, Birkirkara, E: carolynsultana@gmail.com, Facebook: WomensHealthPhysiotherapyMalta

The post 2 simple exercises to strengthen your pelvic floor after birth first appeared on Maltamum.

Only 1 month left before the school starts in Malta, but in other countries with colder climates, like Sweden, the primary school just started. I was lucky enough to see the following post being shared on Facebook in the local group ‘Parenting from the womb: positive discipline for our children‘ and I felt that I had to share it with you. I would have loved to be greeted this way when I first started school, and I certainly wish that my son will receive such a warm welcome as a first grader.

Copied translation from another post as seen on Facebook:

‘A letter sent home by a first grade teacher in Sweden that I translated because it’s just so wonderful it should be shared!

******************************************************************

Now it’s time for a new semester of school and you’ll start in first grade. My name is Evelina and I am your new teacher. What fun that YOU are going to be in my class. We will find very new, fun and exciting things inschool this semester. I have sent a few things to you. These things you can need when you start school. There are also things that explains how things work in school.

First of all, I sent a bracelet. On the bracelet it says “Knowledge is cool”. I beaded this for you and I did it to show that it’s brilliant to have skills and knowledge about a lot of different things.

You get an eraser because everyone makes mistakes. It is from our mistakes we learn and develop. If you had already known everything you wouldn’t need to go to school.

The sticker you get to show that we stick together in class. We are a team that will work together and win through cooperation.

You also get a puzzle-piece to show how well we fit together, that everyone is different and that everyone needed for us to be our best.

The bookmark is telling you that you always have a place here with us in class. This place is here no matter how you’re feeling that day.

In the letter is also a packet of smarties. It shows how clever I think you are. We will learn a lot of fun things together and from each other.

Finally, I’m sending you a star. This you are getting as you no doubt understand because it symbolises YOU! For me, you are a star that will grow stronger and brighten every day.

Welcome to first grade. See you on Monday.’

The post This is how a 1st grader should be welcomed to school first appeared on Maltamum.

Guest post by Anya Sol*

And so you did it!

Whether naturally, a C-section, with complications or without, you had your baby!

Now some months shall pass, you get the hang of breast or bottle feeding, get used to sleepless nights and eating whatever is in your reach, manage to remember to at least put some sort of clothes on before leaving your house and start forgetting how a relaxed 20 minute shower even feels like.

You get used to this new and strange routine and sooner or later will start wondering how to restore the old romance with your hubby (if you still remember you got one).

I remember taking deep breaths in my bathroom as I reach out for the mirror in complete privacy in order to see what damage has been done, than having a look and searching for a steady seat to ease myself down on as my knees give in… Oh lord…

Things change. You might have un unpleasant horizontal or vertical scar across your tummy or an unsightly stitching on your perineum or even internal vaginal tearing, but I beg you – do not despair, it will eventually heal up!

Of course I am no medical expert to identify a healing duration of a particular case, but I assure you, if the damage was that permanent, no one would re-start the intimate life or let alone have a second child ever.

So as you heal and come to terms with certain changes in your body you will finally have a talk with your partner about well, starting the sex life again.

At this point if it has been just a couple of weeks since your delivery I can virtually see your eyes popping out – what? SEX?! Are you kidding me? Never again! But I am ready to bet that yes, you will have sex again.

Fair enough the times of wild spontaneous passion might be gone and you have to work around your baby’s schedule, but that doesn’t necessarily make you celibate.

If you are breastfeeding the chances also are that your libido seems to have curled up and died somewhere quietly without you even noticing. It might take an extra effort for your partner to turn you on, but I am dead sure he will be able to understand and offer you a helping hand considering that he is the one interested in the outcome most.

Another aspect is obviously the actual sensations during the intercourse. I won’t lie to you here – the first couple of times might be somewhat uncomfortable. But that will beyond any doubt change as well.

And finally to the juicy part. Ever heard the rumours that sex gets better after birth? They are actually true for most women!

Here is what is very likely to happen to you: once you wean your baby completely your libido will sky rocket to hights unseen before. I mean really higher and higher (having a spare man at hand is highly recommended for this period, but I do not vouch for his general well-being as within the first two weeks after weaning he might crawl out half-dead from underneath you).

Sensations? Easier and faster achievable orgasms, higher pain threshold, higher stamina, multiple orgasms and more intense orgasms are just to mention a few possibilities. That is definitely worth waiting for.

To conclude: keep patient, be open with your partner, give it time, go gently, have realistic expectations and the reward will definitely come.

Enjoy!

Yours faithfully, Anya Sol

*Anya Sol is a 31 year old mum of a young girl and works as an Online Marketing Manager.

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