No one is perfect my love

Erik and his friends listened to a kids’ song the other day, that was all about how you’re perfect just the way you are. One of his friends acknowledged that, and said ‘I’m perfect’. Erik brought the statement home and asked me what I think of that. 

I told him that I understand the premises of the song and of this kind of mottos, aiming to build up their confidence, but I disagree, cause no one is perfect. 

I didn’t tell him the following, but I don’t see how we can truly help our kids build strong self-confidence based on falsities. Kids are smart. They can easily notice when something they do is not right, let alone ‘perfect’. How would that make them feel about themselves when we call them ‘perfect’ and they fail to adhere to that?

Back to our discussion, I told Erik I don’t want him to think he’s perfect. I don’t want him to strive for perfection in life. It’s just plain wrong and raises expectations to an impossible level. I told him Mummy is not perfect, Daddy is not perfect. Him and Nelly are not perfect either. But we do love each other, just the way we are, and that what matters is that we all try our best.

We all do mistakes, have our flaws and that’s OK. What truly matters, is not to be afraid to try again and again. To give it our best shot, not because we want to be perfect, but because it’s in our human nature to want to do better, to want to be better. 

What I really wish for him and his sister? I wish them to keep on learning and to keep on questioning stuff. Not to allow expectations of perfection to stop them from trying, from failing and trying again. I wish for them to keep on moving forward and not allow perfection to take them to a halt. 

Category: Erik and me