4 weeks after birth I feel confident enough to share my story with all of you here.

Οn the 31/03/2014 my first son was delivered via emergency c-section. When he was first brought to me after what felt like hours to me, I looked at him and thought ‘this could be any baby’. A couple of very hard weeks followed where I had difficulties accepting the birth experience, bonding with my baby and coping with being a mum. I spent over two weeks crying every day, wondering whether I could ever love my baby the way he deserves and the way I assumed I was supposed to from the very first moment. I felt guilty for not loving him. I wished he was back in my belly and I felt guilty for thinking if I gave him away this would be a relief. I took care of him, cuddled him, responded to the slightest sign of him being uncomfortable but everything out of duty and never with the love and passion I thought a new mother ought to feel for her baby. When he was on my breast I looked down at his beautiful face and felt empty and sad. I read the love in his daddy’s eyes and was jealous but at the same time relieved that ‘my little baby had a least someone who loved him unconditionally’.

What helped me get back on track was being honest about my experience from the very first moment on. I so much wished for a natural birth and I had read enough to know that unexpected turnouts can cause trauma and depression. I wasn’t prepared but in my head I knew my feelings were ok and I was ‘allowed’ to feel sad and depressed. So I told friends honestly what I felt. It took me a while however to confess to my husband that I thought I did not love our baby. From that moment onwards, I started to become better. And speaking to one of my closest friends one night I suddenly realised it was not the cesarean that had left me helpless and depressed but the whole experience with antenatal, birth and postnatal care that I had gone through.

To sum up my story quickly I was ment to be induced at due date +4 for no obvious reason. The doctor who I saw one week before my due date got out his calendar before even examining me properly. I objected the induction and was asked to come again one week later for a check. from that moment onwards a nightmare started of me fighting for my right of having natural, spontaneous labour and what I guess are hospital procedures. At +2 my blood pressure went up slightly (due to what I assume was pure stress caused by the doctors’ talks about induction and increasing still birth rates), as I objected to being induced again I was asked to stay over night for being monitored. At first this sounded like a fair compromise to me but it quickly turned out, it was just another way of trying to scare me into an induction and the next day I discharged myself from hospital, much to the anger of the doctors.

They looked at me as if I was that irresponsible mother who put her baby’s life at risk for her own sake of having a natural birth. none of the doctors would listen to my fears and my reasons. it was all about procedures and I cannot even count how many refusal papers I had to sign. from now on I went to hospital every day for a monitor. Most of the midwifes secretly supported me in the absence of the doctors. But there I was, supposed to take decisions solely based on what I thought and felt was right for me and my baby. I felt like there was no one at the hospital who I could trust. and every time I went in, I would see a different doctor and start the same discussion over and over again… until at +8 my waters broke at home spontaneously.

I cannot even tell how happy I was, thinking ‘the moment has come’. With all the talk about induction, rupturing membranes, procedures etc. I had always thought I just have to make it into labour and then everything will go its way. How wrong I was. One hour after my waters had broken I was at hospital. was 1 cm dilated, but still 2 cm long and firm. No contractions. 4 hours later (I hate these damn 4 hours, everything is 4 hours at the delivery suite!), I was still without contractions and meant to be put on the drip which I refused. When I refused the drip I asked the midwife ‘what would you do if you were me?’ I think she wanted to help me and give a hint by responding that it was procedure to start the drip after 4 hours but women in my situation in England were allowed to go home again, check their temperature and come back when contractions were strong and regular.

Maybe she wanted to indirectly encourage me to discharge myself again and to take my own decision again but this time I was too scared and too confused to fully understand what was happening to me. I knew that with the babies head not engaged there was the danger of cord prolapse and with the waters gushing out I was too afraid to go home. But as the midwife allowed me to, I did everything I could to start labour. I was walking around, rocking on the ball to no success. Looking back, this might have been a huge mistake as my baby’s head wasn’t engaged and this might have caused the cord to prolapse but I will never know for sure. 10 hours from the time my waters had broken still nothing had happened. the midwife on charge had changed and this time I agreed to the drip. So at 6 pm they started the drip.

Contractions started hitting in but they were bearable. However, at 8 pm there was still no sign of progress, so the midwife advised me to get an epidural in order to help my cervix soften. By that time I had a feeling like this was going to lead to a cesarean and told my partner ‘better get the epidural now than being put to sleep later on’. At 9 pm the heart-rate of my baby dropped drastically. From there on everything happened very fast. The midwife told me ‘that not every women’s body was meant to birth a baby’ the doctor who had to speak to me and get the signature for the cesarean did not even dare to speak out the word as she was there when I had discharged myself from hospital the week before and probably saw me as crazy and of unsound mind.

But what they all did not understand that I never ever meant to put my baby’s life at risk. The opposite was the case: I was so full of love for this unborn baby that I did everything to advocate for an enjoyable welcome in this world experience for my baby and for me. But I would have never refused any necessity. And in the end in my situation the cesarean was a necessity. It might have saved my baby’s life. so I told the doctor ‘I understand what you’re saying and I am willing to agree to anything now to get this baby out healthy’. 30 mins later he was born.

Meanwhile I have accepted the cesarean birth. As I said in my situation it was necessary. But I cannot help but question whether my whole situation could have been avoided. The worst thing is the feeling that you cannot trust anybody. That you’re completely on your own but with this huge responsibility that you carry inside of you. That to the doctors you’re not a human being, you’re part of their routine. And if you don’t obey, you’re crazy and a troublemaker. I felt there was nowhere I could turn to. And I think this is what broke me afterwards. The thinking whether I took the right decisions. Every night going through the whole experience again and wondering whether different decisions might have had a different outcome. It is not my body that is not capable! it was the doctors who did not trust my abilities and chose their routine’s over my capability of birthing my baby on her own pace and at her own time. It was procedures that ruined it for me and turned it into the nightmare. Or am I maybe just trying to find people to blame…

I hardly ever saw the same doctor twice. How was I meant to gain trust? Even though I have accepted what happened to me (that is how I felt… it happened. I had lost control), I will never forget the music in delivery suite, the midwifes bright lipstick face on the second day of my stay, the music played on tv of one of my room neighbours on the 2nd night. It will always remind me of my helplessness. But I told myself I won’t feel that powerless again should I ever be blessed with another baby. And I am glad to say that now I love my son more and more every day. I cannot stop looking at him and I adore everything he does. He makes up for the pain and I take care of him with love and passion.

Thank you for reading my story,
a mama

The post A mama’s struggles for natural birth and an emergency c-section first appeared on Maltamum.

Guest writer Becky Gauci-Maistre*

On Tuesday 16th July 2012, in the water, after 19 hours of labour, 17 of which were at home, Louisa was born into a joyous and peaceful environment. Caught by a midwife and straight into mummy’s arms and breast, while daddy looked on proudly and the doula captured it all on video. Louisa only left mummy’s arms for a four minute paediatric check while mummy delivered the placenta. She then met her older sister and spent the rest of the night in mummy’s arms. They all went home as a family of four, 14 hours later, after getting a good nights’ sleep.

Two years four months earlier, her older sister Emily was born unnecessarily early, surgically, with no love, under harsh lights, in a freezing room. She never heard mummy’s voice or felt mummy’s touch. Mummy was asleep. Little preemie Emily was whisked away into an incubator with only the midwife’s calculating hands, and daddy’s voice for comfort. Two and a half hours later, Emily was bundled into several layers and taken to mummy’s room, where a drugged mummy got to hold her for barely 2 minutes. Mummy has no memory of this, or of the next 48 plus hours. Although not confined to the incubator, Emily was kept in the nursery most of the time, and fed formula against her parents’ wishes.

How could two births be so different?

The biggest difference in these two births is not so much the mode of delivery, but, much more, the mother-baby centric (or lack of) approaches. During the second birth, the mother had autonomy[1] over her body. She was an active participant throughout the pregnancy and was encouraged to have faith in her body and in nature. She was not a patient, but a client of the doctor and midwives who assisted her throughout the pregnancy and through the delivery. She was allowed to choose who to support her through the labour and delivery, every intervention was discussed and done with consent. When fears arose, the maternity team took the time to talk things through and work to release that fear. There were no scare tactics, no “fear-mongering”, no discouraging remarks. There was a constant reminder that she owned her body and that would be respected.

During the first birth, which ended in (what the mother maintains to be) an unnecessary surgical birth, it was a very different story. No midwives were involved. The pregnancy was considered a medical emergency that should be feared. She was a ticking time bomb waiting to explode from even before that positive pregnancy test. The pregnancy had to be managed with every possible intervention available. This fear became very ingrained, especially when every intervention led to more problems. When the mother was experiencing some strong Braxton Hicks, a series of events starting with a trip to the doctor’s office, led to the mother lying on an operating table at 35 weeks gestation in fear for her life and that of her first child’s, having just been told they were both in severe danger. Everything happened so fast, and nobody stopped to listen to the mother’s protests or assuage her worries. The husband was busy filling out copious insurance details and organising leave from work. The midwife who would assist the delivery had no time to stop and discuss anything with the mother. At no point was the mother made to feel like she was more than an incubator that was doing a very bad job.

Eight weeks postpartum, the mother was diagnosed with birth-related PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder), and from that point on a long road to recovery began…

Following the experience, the mother, Joanna, embarked on a journey of healing and education. Having been told that all future children will likely be born premature, via c-section and, (she assumed), under general anesthesia, she firmly vowed to not have any more children. However, she was determined to make a good experience come of this by sharing her story. When she discovered she was 5 weeks pregnant in November 2011, she thought her world would crumble around her. She turned to her online support community. They supplied information on VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean), CBAC (cesarean birth after cesarean), how to choose maternity care providers, how to deal with birth after a traumatic birth, and so on. By the time 12 weeks rolled along, Joanna felt prepared to start facing up to the pregnancy and start interviewing care providers.

At 14 weeks she visited a well-known gynecologist reputed to be pro-natural birth and VBAC. A quick ultrasound confirmed a healthy baby growing perfectly. However, the appointment with the gynecologist was not so pleasant. After a few minutes of chitchat, the gynecologist confirmed Joanna was a good VBAC candidate and that he would be very willing to let nature takes its course. Joanna decided to ask the tough questions: What were the limitations? What were the time frames? What about monitoring, drips, pitocin? Would he be on hand during the delivery? Are all his house doctors of the same mind frame? The answers were not pleasant.

The gynecologist replied that Joanna would need to go to hospital at the first contraction or as soon as waters break, whichever came first. Once in hospital, she would have a cannula inserted, just in case IV fluids or pitocin is needed, and monitoring would need to be constant. She would also have approximately six hours to deliver the baby, otherwise the risk of uterine rupture increases[2]. If within six hours there hasn’t been enough progress, the only option would be surgical birth. Joanna was reassured that it would not be so bad as there would be ample time to insert a spinal block or epidural, and she would be treated with respect. He also said that once a cervical stitch[3] had been placed in the first pregnancy, she would need to have one done as soon as possible regardless of whether it was needed. “Once a stitch, always a stitch,” he said. She stood up, thanked the doctor for explaining to her that she would be “humoured” with a trial of labour, but she understands that this was just a nice way of telling her the final outcome will be another cesarean. The stunned look on the doctor’s face as she left the room was little consolation.

Feeling very defeated, she decided to take advice from the two most natural birth advocates on the island. Both gave the same information with regards to who to contact for maternity care. She booked an appointment.

The appointment was a breathe of fresh air. She was called in to the midwife’s office and a detailed history was taken. There was no rush, no ignoring of little details, lots of light-hearted chatting and empathy for the traumatic experience. With a pretty little booklet filled in, she was ushered into the doctor’s office. He took a few minutes to introduce himself and read the booklet the midwife had filled out. He asked how she felt and asked her to repeat her history. He then asked if she would like an ultrasound, which she consented to. With an enormous screen in front of her, he took the time to explain everything she was seeing. When he was done, he printed out a series of photos and asked her to take a seat again.

The doctor asked Joanna if she had any questions, so she asked about the constraints of a VBAC. He replied that once there was no labour the first time, this labour would mimic a first-time mother, so there was no telling how long it could take. Monitoring would be to a minimum and she would be free to labour as she pleased. He suggested she visit the labour and recovery rooms before leaving. He suggested a healthy diet, free from white flour and refined sugars. Joanna asked about cervical stitches, to which the doctor replied it was an antiquated practice that showed more risk and little benefits, and there was no indication it was needed anyway. He also verified that he would not perform any vaginal exams during the pregnancy unless absolutely required. This was directly in line with all the research Joanna had done. Suddenly this pregnancy was looking brighter.

Having found the right support team, Joanna set to educating herself to extremes, reading medical journals, discussing in midwifery forums, speaking to women who had unassisted births and even watching videos of humans and animals giving birth. She started a HypnoBabies home course, and listened to the Affirmations track at every opportunity. She hired a birth doula, and attended more ante-natal and childbirth classes.

At 35 weeks, she was feeling very weepy, anxious and was getting very frequent Braxton Hicks that could be timed. Panic and fear set in. She called her doula.

“I’ve been waiting for this to happen,” the doula chirped pleasantly. “I was worried you’d need to deal with this during labour and have been planning on how to tackle it for some time. I’m so pleased it’s hit you now.” Her relaxed demeanour was confusing but reassuring. After a very long telephone conversation, Joanna walked away with a new phrase “prodromal labour”[4]. She hit her online community and was inundated with information. Things fell into place. What she had felt, that fateful day just over two years ago was Prodromal Labour, and here it was again.

Every evening at 5pm, the prodromal labour would start, and promptly stop at approximately 5am the next day…for 5 weeks. Everyone was very pleased this was happening: “your body is preparing”, they said. “You are doing the hard work now and labour will be easier.” “Your baby is doing a great job of getting into position, work with her, encourage her to move down into your pelvis.”

The birth story is a very exciting one, and deserves a dedicated article, that will help explore non-typical labour patterns, the value of a good birth support team, including a doula and much more.

At 9.50pm on the 16^th of July, supported by her husband,  a doctor, two midwives, a doula and empowered by determination and knowledge, Joanna water birthed a 2.8kg, healthy, chubby baby into the world with little assistance. The baby suckled like a pro from the get go and the euphoria experienced by the whole family is still something they feel elated by almost two years later.

Whilst not everyone will VBAC after a traumatic birth, it is the feeling of empowerment, control and consent experienced by the family unit that is the crucial part. Whether a mother births by elective repeat cesarean birth, by trial of labour ending in a repeat cesarean birth or by vaginal birth, the decisions must lie with the family. They are entitled to all the facts and information from their care providers. They are entitled to informed consent. They are entitled to a trauma-free experience. They are entitled to a true outcome of healthy mother and healthy baby, because it is only when a woman is respected and treated with dignity that she can truly feel herself to be a confident mother. The events leading up to birth, birth itself and the early post-partum days are ever so delicate. It is up to every one of us to support women in achieving an experience that they will recount with pride, joy and a deep knowledge of self-worth.

The post A healing journey of empowerment – Birth after traumatic birth first appeared on Maltamum.

IMPORTANT NOTE: The purpose of this article is just to INFORM about procedures and that there can be other options! The article is based on my experience, and what I’ve read on my own (all sources included). One can always question and express concerns, but each case is different, and you should ALWAYS consult your doctor(s), as they know what’s best for you and your case. 

——————————————————

Although I had a low risk, uncomplicated pregnancy, I had a difficult, complicated and extremely painful birth experience. I was very close to an emergency cesarean, which I avoided thanks to a wide pelvic bone, and my baby was born with episiotomy and vacuum extraction. You can read my birth story here. I decided to look more into certain common practices, for the sake of others, and for a future pregnancy of my own.

This is what I found out. PLEASE READ IT, SHARE IT WITH YOUR PREGNANT FRIENDS, inform yourselves and others, and talk to your doctor in advance about the different standard hospital procedures and protocols, your options and what YOU want for YOUR baby and YOUR body.

1) Artificial rupture of membranes (ARM) – midwife breaking your water

It seems to be common practice to ask you to break your water if you are in labour and it hasn’t broken already. My labour started naturally and I went to the hospital to give birth. When I went there and into the delivery room, and at the very beginning of the whole process and 3 or 4 cm dilated, I was asked if I would like to have my water broken artificially as this would speed up the process. I didn’t know any better, so I agreed.

Well, IT DIDN’T SPEED UP THE PROCESS, and I had not sufficient liquids to ease the baby out when this was needed. Plus, I was not informed about the RISKS involved, which apparently are quite a few.

Please read this:

‘The forewaters usually break when the cervix is almost fully open and the membranes are bulging so far into the vagina that they burst. This ‘fluid burst’ lubricates the vaginal and perineum to facilitate movement of the baby and stretching of the tissues’. ‘Around 80-90% of women start labour with their membranes intact. This is probably because the amniotic sac plays an important role in the physiology of a natural birth.’ (Source: In defense of the amniotic sac).

Moreover,

‘Your midwife may suggest breaking your waters to speed up your labour. Breaking your waters near the beginning of labour isn’t recommended, as it doesn’t make any difference to the length of labour. ‘

‘However, if the active stage of labour slows right down, breaking the waters can help get labour going again. This does tend to shorten labour by about an hour. If you agree to the procedure, here is how your midwife will do it. Once you are on the bed, she will remove the last section of the bed so that your bottom is right at the end. She may ask you to put your legs up in stirrups, or to just hold them apart. ‘

‘Your contractions may become much stronger after your waters have been broken. Be prepared to work hard with breathing and relaxation exercises. Or you can ask your midwife for some pain relief if you need extra help.’
(Source: Speeding up labour)

Keep on reading:

‘In a spontaneous labour the rationale for an ARM is that once the forewaters have gone the hard baby’s head will apply direct pressure to the cervix and open it quicker. However, a cochrane review of the available research states that “the evidence showed no shortening of the length of first stage of labour and a possible increase in cesarean section. Routine amniotomy is not recommended for normally progressing labours or in labours which have become prolonged.” The Royal College of Midwives (UK) have evidenced based guidelines about ‘rupturing membranes’ that you can download from their site.

There are also risks associated with an ARM:

1. It may increase contraction intensity and pain which can result in the woman feeling unable to cope and choosing an epidural… and the intervention rollercoaster begins.
2. The baby may become distressed due to compression of the placenta, baby and/or cord (as described above).
3. Fok et al (2005) found amniotomy altered fetal vascular blood flow, suggesting there is a fetal stress response following an ARM.
4. The umbilical cord may be swept down by the waters and either past the baby’s head, or wedged next to the baby’s head. This is called a ‘cord prolapse’ and is an emergency situation. The compression of the cord interrupts or stops the supply of oxygen to the baby and the baby must be born asap by c-section. The only cord prolapse I have been involved with happened after an ARM (not done by me – honest!). The outcome for the woman was a live baby born by emergency c-section. Her previous 2 babies had been vaginal births.
5. If there is a blood vessel running through the membranes (see picture below) and the amni-hook ruptures the vessel, the baby will lose blood volume fast – another emergency situation.
6. There is a slight increase in the risk of infection but mostly for the mother (not baby). This risk is minimal if nothing is put into the vagina during labour (ie. hands, instruments etc.).’

(Source: In defense of the amniotic sac – worth reading the whole article and comments!).

2) Discontinuation of epidural at 10cm dilation, during active labor

These two articles are super interesting to read, and related to the discontinuation of the epidural. I had epidural, they stopped it at 10cm dilation and the pain, I felt it was unbearable.

The following text is from the article Turning off the epidural for pushing

“Epidural anesthesia is a powerful form of pain relief commonly used in labor and delivery. It is strong enough to be used even for cesarean births, allowing a mother to be awake and alert for her baby’s birth without experiencing the pain of surgery. However, as with anything, the epidural does carry risks. One of the risks frequently associated with epidural anesthesia is an inability to push effectively and/or an increase in the use of forceps or vacuum extraction, called an instrumental vaginal delivery (IVD).

A theory began to emerge that if an epidural was turned down or discontinued to allow a mother to have better sensation during the pushing stage of labor, that these risks would decrease. Many women were requesting this in an attempt to have better control. However, it was discovered that this theory does not appear to work in this manner.

One problem is that of pain relief. Once the body has been numbed with the epidural, it stops producing as many of the helpful hormones that allow natural pain relief, because the mother isn’t experiencing pain. So to turn off the epidural at this point requires the body to catch up, in effect, to help alleviate pain naturally. This causes the mother even more pain than if she had chosen not to have an epidural.

The other issue is that we don’t really seem to be able to prove that there is a decrease in the instrumental vaginal deliveries. There is a call out for more research to find a way to lower the risks of forceps and vacuum extraction births. One other way that is currently being used more effectively, without discontinuing the epidural, is laboring down. This is basically just allowing women who choose epidurals to labor a bit longer before beginning to push, allowing the fetal head to come down naturally. Many institutions are having a lot of luck with this technique, be sure to ask about it at your prenatal care appointments and in your childbirth class.

Sources:

Discontinuation of epidural analgesia late in labour for reducing the adverse delivery outcomes associated with epidural analgesia. Torvaldsen S, Roberts CL, Bell JC, Raynes-Greenow CH. Cochrane Database Syst Rev. 2004 Oct 18;(4):CD004457. Review.

A retrospective case-controlled study of the association between request to discontinue second stage labor epidural analgesia and risk of instrumental vaginal delivery. Toledo P, McCarthy RJ, Ebarvia MJ, Wong CA. Int J Obstet Anesth. 2008 Jul 8.’

From another source, Doctors Urge Patience, And Longer Labor, To Reduce C-Sections

‘Women with low-risk pregnancies should be allowed to spend more time in labor, to reduce the risk of having an unnecessary C-section, the nation’s obstetricians say.

The new guidelines on reducing cesarean deliveries are aimed at first-time mothers, according to the American College of Obstetricians and the Society for Maternal-Fetal Medicine, which released the guidelines Wednesday online and in Obstetrics and Gynecology.
About one-third of all births in the U.S. are done by C-section, and most of those are in first-time mothers. There’s been a 60 percent increase in these deliveries since the 1990s, but childbirth hasn’t become markedly safer for babies or mothers.

That discrepancy has led many to conclude that the operation is being overused. A C-section is major surgery. The procedure can increase complications for the mother and raise the risk during future pregnancies.

Women giving birth for the first time should be allowed to push for at least three hours, the guidelines say. And if epidural anesthesia is used, they can push even longer. Techniques such as forceps are also recommended to help with vaginal delivery.

Early labor should also be given more time, the doctors say, with the start of active labor redefined to cervical dilation of 6 centimeters, rather than 4.’

PLEASE LOOK MORE INTO THESE COMMON PROCEDURES ON YOUR OWN, EDUCATE YOURSELVES, DISCUSS ABOUT THEM OPENLY WITH YOUR DOCTOR, AND AVOID RISKS, COMPLICATIONS AND EXCRUCIATING PAIN, THAT IS, IF THEY CAN BE AVOIDED.
All the best with your future births and babies,

Liza
xxx

The post 2 hospital labour procedures you might want to avoid! first appeared on Maltamum.

I gave birth at 01:20, Saturday the 3rd of August. I was almost a week overdue but I realized something was happening since Tuesday night the 29th July. That’s when I started feeling period like cramps every night since I went into labour. On Thursday night, the cramp pains were getting stronger and more frequent, but a bit irregular. I assumed they were contractins. They would go from every 30′ all the way down to every 7′ and then every 5′, and then go back to a weird 6′ and then 7′ and so on. So although I felt I was in labour, according to what we had been told and what I read, I couldn’t be. The contractions were irregular.

We waited for the morning to come, and go to the hospital for our scheduled appointment to check the baby’s and my condition. But we went to the hospital a bit earlier than planned, around 09:00, just to be on the safe side.

I went to the monitor, to check how often the contractions come and go, and the midwife told me that we still have time but confirmed I was in labour. I could go home if I wanted to and come in later, when the contractions would be 5′ apart, but I might as well just stay in the hospital and go check how much dilated am I.

I decided to go for the second option, cause as we were about to leave the antenatal clinic, the contractions were coming more often and were stronger. I went to the delivery suite to be checked by a midwife, and if I correctly remember I was 4 cm dilated. So we stayed in the hospital, Roy went to pick up my stuff from the car and we started preparing ourselves for the big moment.

I wasn’t supposed to eat, but I was starving, so I had a small breakfast before entering the delivery suite. After that, everything seemed to progress terribly slowly. One of the two midwives that were with me asked me if I agree to let her break the water to speed up the process. I said yes, but till to this day, I am not sure if that was a good decision.

The contractions were bearable and it took a while before I started using the gas. The gas made me feel like getting stoned. But it eased the pain for a short while. When I was 5cm dilated I was going mental, felt I was dying, so I asked for an epidural. The anesthtologist was very good, success with the syringe on the first attempt, and he didn’t hurt me. After that, I was more or less in heaven. I could feel the contractions but almost no pain.

That lasted for a couple of hours but although they were expecting me to give birth sometime around 20:00, we were getting close to 23:00 and there was still no progress. I still had irregular contractions and I was far from giving birth. So they decided to stop the epidural. That was terrible. From feeling almost no pain, waves of pain started hitting me big time. I was 10 cm dilated. I don’t remember much from these terrible hours other than biting Roy’s arm, getting angry with a midwife who spoke in Maltese and I didn’t understand what was she talking about, I admit I swore and screamed a bit, and felt I could not push Erik out. Something felt wrong.

I was telling the midwives to do an episiotomy and get him out but since Erik didn’t seem distressed and my blood pressure was fine, they insisted I could do it. After 2h of no success, I was about to faint, and in what felt like seconds the doctor came in (a very good doctor that I had seen often during my pregnancy visits), performed an episiotomy and Vacuum extraction to get Erik out. Erik turned out that he was descending with the big part of his head, and luckily my pelvic bone was wide enought to extract him out without the need of an emergency cesarean, and with the umbilical cord all around his neck. There was no chance I could push him out on my own. Erik luckily started crying right after they cut it while he was placed on a table to be examined, Roy started crying next to me, and I lied down relieved.

After that, although exhausted, I somehow found some extra energy reserves and all I wanted was to take him in my arms and nurse him. Although his head was bruised and he must have suffered big time, he was super strong and took the breast right away. He was a big, cute boy, with just a little bit of red hair, weighing 3.8 kg. He smelt and felt so sweet againg my skin. After going through what felt like hell, I was elevated in heaven <3

Malta Mum – Liza

The post Erik’s birth story – vacuum exctraction first appeared on Maltamum.

My dream had always been to make a big family of my own. After being married for 5 years with my dear Richard, we decided it was time for a new addition to our family.

My birth story is quite simple. After four months of trying to conceive I got pregnant. Apart from some nausea during the first trimester, and having gained 30 kilos in total – making it hard for me to walk around in the last two months, I didn’t experience any complications. I was simply expecting impatiently the big day.

When I was in the 39th week, 5th August 2013 and late at night, I started feeling some sort of pain that reminded me of the long forgotten period cramps. I took a shower to relax, watched some TV, and when the cramps started being regular, coming every 5 minutes just, I woke up my husband. It was time to head to the hospital. I was suddenly overwhelmed with fear and impatience to finally meet our precious one.

When we arrived at Mater Dei I was already dilated 4cm. The water broke right on time, half an hour after we entered the delivery room. I managed to cope with the pain just by using the gas as a pain relief method. Richard was with me in the room the whole time. With the help of two midwives, three hours later I was holding in my hands a tiny and oh so beautiful little girl, 2.8 kilos, with lots of brown hair. Our precious Rebecca.

I’ve heard many women saying that the pain is unbearable. In my case it was bearable. In fact, the pain from the stitches the weeks after (I tore because she came out fast) was worse.

Mummy Maria Grech

The post An easy labour first appeared on Maltamum.